for J.D.

WE LOVE YOU JD
 WE LOVE YOU
                   

and furthermore, for all intents and purposes,

now with the latest on a blog hiatus:::   i hope ya'll haven't been growling and grumpling like a got dang stomach.
sure, this squadron ain't been blogging  for a minute, but we have been thinking,  and we damn sure think we've found our blog niche! (echo sentiment amongst oneselves)
we have decided as a team ( interns and i), to use our previous 8 blog entries as a sort of template for our future activities.  as you perhaps have noticed, we only hit ya'll with blog data in the month of october 2010.  we mention this because we have chosen to make all future entries in a similiar style, strictly within the confines of one particular month at a time.  thus you can fully expect that when we begin we'll punch up all sorts of datafiles and databanks and datachips within any one calendar month, several top notch entries, but you'll have to wait until we're ready to transmit. it could be may of 2011 or august of 2014 or whatever fuckin month the future holds depending on the potency and projected timetable of what we're unleashing.  we're compiling people, get off the freaking blog's back!
but rest assured, when we finally roll out our red carpet data, we'll be rendering radioactive chasm after chasm, thus fathom an unprecedented blog frenzy, the likes of which has yet to be seen in the states and lower canada!
in the meantime, enjoy our past blogosphere meanderings (and such), treat each other well, and do not fuck around at mother earth's expense people.  if &when you do, as bambaataa once said: "she will chew you up and spit your ass out."

 **(compiling note: our 1st entry will be on the law enforcement officials behind the doctoring of phil spector's mug shot in an attempt to tarnish his public persona) (2nd entry on the greatest finger roll of all times by clyde drexler with portland against the rockets in the playoffs that year. although blog entry pending  interview with drexler and drexler's masseuse) (3rd entry written [on location] at a house of ill repute, topic likely highly provocative) (4th entry analysis on dentures, hairpieces, and glass eyes - the trifecta) (5th entry on orson welles)  (6th entry unknown)
                            (7th entry unknown)
                             (8th entry unknown)
                              (9th entry unknown)
                         (10th entry on mantronix)  (11th entry is the personal account of a snorkling excursion at a haunted lagoon)   

p.s. i hope there ain't no databreach.                                                             

the Dean of Halloween

all you trick o treaters out there trying to get extra spooky tonite, you better step up your game if you think you can just dress up as howard dean and mail in the persona . i better hear ya'll coming from half a block away pontificating about this state and that. because this cat howard dean, if nothing else, he got some damn vocal chords! so around 3 o'clock you better start warming up your voice for your evening performance, otherwise you aint getting no darn snack from this house . and work extra on your damn howard dean screeeeech!!  by the way, all you dean haters, you know you'd be on his tip back circa 1850 if he was around. listen to the voice amplify, he doesn't need no darn microphone- and would've dominated the lecture curcuit way back when with his booming voice/ pizazz/etc.
put your arrow at 20 seconds and have some damn fun!

Ventriloquists vs. Puppeteers

(**blog note:  in regards to our last posting, we will not be forming another blog. we were in fact the victim of a vicious practical joke by a rival blog.)

let me begin by saying, i am in fact a big fan of both puppeteers and ventriloquists.  you're both dynamos in my book!!  and my interest in your craft is what makes my plea all the more urgent.  see, i sense a gulf brewing between you two groups of artisans. a beef growing between the two factions at the clubs and coffeehouses and street corners of your performances.  i've grown increasingly wary of the arguments and bickering i've seen between the ventriloquist and puppeteer communities at your gigs and functions.   and my goal is to end it now, to in fact squash this beef!

perhaps it was always inevitable that you titans would clash.  you have much more in common as performers than perhaps you would like to assume: there are major similiaries between your works.  and now with the economy in a standstill and your audiences nitpicking precisely where to spend their entertainment dollar, both  professions increasingly wage battle as you try to book the same venues and attract the same consumer, and find these consumers choosing one or the other. your demographic simply overlaps.  in a perfect world, the public would support both groups. 

and who am i to be getting all highfalutin on ya'll, you ask?  well i'm the customer, the rare one out there who has been supporting both sides.  and i just feel it's time to hash this all out.  i'm proposing a sitdown of sorts, a roundtable discussion which i am willing to mediate.  these proceedings shall take place at a neutral site, preferably in north america, with the clear intentions of discussing the problems and obstacles faced from the perspective of both camps, and how we can all specifically overcome them.  let's be civil and grow together.  we don't have to join hands and sing 'com by yah', but i don't want to see this quarreling spill out into the streets either. 

 i'm gonna give both sides a few days to think about this.   but make no mistake, we are now at the precipice.  the crossroads.  and it is here where i will once again state my position : i consider both groups to be beautiful mechanisms of the universe!  LET'S END THIS DANG GULF!

in the nick of time

dear internet folk(s): 
there is a very good chance, and it appears to be both likely and probable, that any second now, this blog will cease to exist as we merge with another faction and form an entirely new entity.  indeed, all signs are pointing to our blog being renamed, reaffiliated, and refocused- from the bottom up. 
this is the scoop now: we're getting sucked up by a conglomerate, to be fazed in with the colossus.  let me reiterate, we'll be merging up with another blog (of equal or more value), or perhaps two other blogs- to conjoin and reform as a megablog. an ultra-blog if you will.
with new cohorts come new concepts and more finger pointing and screaming and such. so stay tuned, buckle up. 
but remember, we're your number one source for information on news pertaining to our blog happenings. vital, vital blog things.

further details to follow.  very soon, i assure you.
momentarily.
this could be them on the other line now.

mindbending findings...does anyone give a hot damn??

Cosmic rays sent by NASA's 2001 mars odyssey spacecraft first detected underground water on Mars in 2002.  The Mars Phoenix Lander confirmed it in july 2008.  Ice on Mars? carbon containing chemicals - a planet within our solar system with soil rich in hydrogen- put it on the damn marquee!  They've detected these raw materials of life (as we know them) at the red planet's south pole, yet no one (outside of the science community) seems to give a hot damn.  I never heard a darn peep about the topic on the McLaughlin Group (pbs), larry king (cnn) had those twirps on with that phony alien footage but zilch on mars, and my local 11 o'clock newz barely mentioned it in passing.  ho hum.

I'm no darn astrophysicist, or climatologist- but it would seem to me this finding is of the utmost importance.  There are explicit implications: the building blocks of life existing on another planet in our solar system, and there are numberLESS solar systems.  I'm reminded of that scientist on pbs awhile back stating that for we humans to believe we're alone in the universe(s) would be inexplicably egocentric.  We're destroying our own planet and we've found another where molecules could (theoretically) expand, creating plants and oxygen.  Yet we, the masses, don't give a hoot?  perhaps we're not the perceptionists we think we are.

There must be a few north americans tickled pink with the mars data, hypothesizing their colonization theories and such?  There's gotta be a focus group or two made up of normal folk (non scientists) out there who get together and break numbers down via chalkboard and overhead projector.  folk trying to monitor the situation while taking Mars scantron tests, passing around protractors and lending each other monocles and shit.   the type to be printing out faxes?  I got a hunch.

I kindof like our trivial ways, but preoccupied and distracted by nonsense (24/7) makes for a shitty planet.
Our tv screens run the gamut, don't they? - but all filth and nothing vital makes you and i (mega) dull.
Are we adoring technologies that undo our capacity to think?   or utilizing and using proper perspective?  what do you monitor?    be that as it may..i like you, and you , and yous. and you and yous.



links: (arthur c. clarke) (protons) (gamma rays) (treacherous three- u.f.o.)
(high apple pie in the sky hopes)

Lee van cleef: the tip top

Mr. Lee Van Cleef at the top of his game: dammit, we're privy to some magic.  what screen presence! 
he makes val kilmer and  matthew mcconaughey and them look like chopped liver- mere pipsqeaks by comparison!

Boston Celtics, NBA season preview 2010-11

report edited for content by mr. phil donahue (copyright phil donahue 2010)

Robert PARISH with a dang throwdown!! good folks like rik smits, mark eaton, and jon koncak still be seeing his repertoire in their gritty nitemares.  the Chief rocked well in the post (right block) with a jerking shoulder fake where he would either spin baseline and jam, or simply turn towards ze right and loft one of his soft rainbow jumpers.  What a dang feathery touch for a big man!  and his outlet passes to midcourt were exquisite.  So, basically the guy's superb.  Next:  the Celtics in 2010 will be challenged  to start fresh(see fresh slate link) after an abysmal ending to a splendid postseason run.  I still haven't seen any replay footage from gm 7 of the finals.  Things sting.  But got dangit we've revamped! jermaine o'neal, shaq, delonte west is back, harangody, marquis daniels is healthy - all these neutrons added to the nucleus mean another run at it.

L.A.: ya'll better simmer. jeez Louise.  Kobe went 6 for 24 in gm 7 and artest hit a lucky three. (edited out portion on the rest of their squadron being peckerheads) We don't want to see San antonio or denver in the finals. we want you.   Indeed Miami, i said the finals, we're coming out the east.  we're gonna go through ya'll like a dang laxative. 

HERE ARE some of the preseason predictions made by the folk(s) at our roundtable luncheon:

worst dressed coach:  Stan van gundy

mvp: (certainly not dwight howard, his mid range shooting touch is wretched.  how in the blue hell is it so bad considering he's had patrick ewing as an assistant coach his whole career) Brandon Roy, portland

most ejections: is vlade divac still in the league?

most fake flops: a european, ya'll flop like dang fish out there. manu ginobli.

most missed retired role player: anthony peeler. this cat always looked like he could roll out of bed and get 20 off the bench. smooth.

all star game mvp: kevin love (on some wes unseld shit)
 next city to get an expansion team: west memphis, arkansas (2023)  winnepeg?
best mfing tattoos:   stephen jackson's stomach
defensive player of the year:  mutombo, free agent

random predictions: Utah Jazz coach Jerry Sloan gets attacked by fan in new jersey(prior to the game). sloan proceeds to beat the piss out of the fan and then coach his team onto slim victory - and refuses to comment afterwards despite having smirk on his face.   Charles Barkley consistently comments negatively on the sleeveless look Mavs owner Mark Cuban begins to cultivate courtside this season.  the Pointer Sisters perform national anthem at the all star game.   Referees continue to never call carrying (palming) and players continue to run hog wild at their expense.   That courtside cameraman who was kicked in the balls by Dennis Rodman years back will have a run in with Milwaukee coach Scott Skiles.

linkage: (cohesive unit) (box and one) (drexler) (larry nance going baseline) (the omni in atlanta) (fat lever)
                   (johnny most on isiah)